Friday, January 07, 2005

Devine Limitations

Ms. G has returned to see me. As if by some miracle she managed not to get lost. As if this meeting was supposed to take place, it said so in the stars.

She is an elderly lady, quite a devout Christian and a wonderful person. Having said that, there is one focus of frustration which she continues to add to my life, Ms. G is the chronic non-compliant patient. She attributes this to her strong belief in god and the fact that, regardless, god will save her.

“Well” I say, “the pills don’t work in the bottle you know”.

“God will save me”

“God helps those who help themselves” I said.

“Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind. That’s Albert Einstein Doc”.

“Religion alters the mind…Tony Follari”, I retorted.

“God's Word, contained in the Bible, has furnished all necessary rules to direct our conduct…Noah Webster”. A war of quotes? Well, I certainly wasn’t ready for this.

“If you give 100%, God will make up the difference, Anonymous”, my comeback.

But it was weak, very weak. As the tide shifted in her favor she gave me a look of disappointment at this frail attempt. I saw grandmother’s eyes looking at me with those puppy eyes and I missed grandma.

Immediately, I added, “Superstition is religion that has grown incongruous with intelligence, John Tyndall”. She was taken back by this, she didn’t see it coming. Her smile made its way up towards those mature eyes, I became more nervous.

“There remains something subtle, intangible and inexplicable. Veneration for this force beyond anything that we can comprehend is my religion, Albert Einstein again, Doc”. Damn it. She continued rambling “Submission to God's will is the softest pillow on which to rest, Anonymous” and “See God in every person, place, and thing, and all will be well in your world, Louis Hay, Doc”.

Feeling outwitted I said "Surely, this must stop if you're to get better, Ms. G". She said "It must not and don't call me Shirley, Airplane".

With that all of my future plans for Ms. G’s workup went out the window and replaced with one line non-compliant patient. Alert and definitely oriented.

You know what they say “Write your plans in pencil but give God the eraser”